Life and Love Today

Consider the Source

Many times our friends try to impose their opinions, and there perceptions and beliefs on you. Meaning all the well, they try to steer you in the direction they see better for you, and sometimes that direction may even really be better. But how do you know which way to go, when friends can be so convincing? and make sense out of what it is they're telling you?


The easiest way to figure out if to take a friends advice with a grain of salt or really give some thought to what your being told, is to consider the source. Think about where that friend's train of thought got them in life. Think about how they handled themselves when they had a similar issue as yours and ask yourself are they even in a position to give out advice?


So many people get hung up on the thoughts and opinions of their friends when it should have no bearing on what you choose to do with your life. Consider the source before allowing someone elses opinion to dictate how you feel and the decisions you make

Are You Happy?

Sometimes the simplest questions comes with the most complicated answers. sometimes we need help to find a focal point, a place to start untangling the web of confusion.

Break Up With Boredom

What to do when the repetition of life becomes unbearable

Go to work, come home,  cook dinner while the kids play and then feed the little rascals before setlling them into bed. By 8pm all your day's responsibilites are done and by 9pm you've showered, tied your hair up and curled into your favorite PJ's. Your day is done and it haven't even reached 10pm yet.


You surf the TV channels only to find nothing of interest, so you switch to surfing the internet until the boredom finally puts you to sleep. The repitition of your life, and the boredom is enough to make you want to pull your hair out just for some excitement.


With a life full of many choices, why choose humdrum and monotony? People get so complacent to the point where they're so bored that it nearly kills them like a low dying death. Thing don't just knock on your door and say "Hey! come try me out! im pretty cool!" Come up with a plan like you plan everything else, set small goals for mini vacations, Join clubs and meet new people, put money aside for the sponanaeity of taking your family out for dinner, or a movie. Whatever interests you, plan it, or do it. Reality is you aren't young anymore and you can't feel the thrill of letting the wind take you, so you have to learn how to make your own current, and your waves and excitement.


Boredome leads to self pity, and self pity leads to depression. Do yourself, and your family a favor and enjoy life. Don't wait for life to come and enjoy you




The Ties That Unbind

When family turns into your worst enemy

When you were kids, you all loved to play, fight, cry , come togther and scheme, and do whatever peaked your little imaginations. But then somewhere along the line, you became strangers and what interested you no longer interests your cousin, or your brother, or sister or that one family member who was always that person you went through lifes crazy and intrigueing obstacles with you. So the ties that bonded you together are now what separates you.


But where did it become a love/hate relationship, or even a hate/hate relationship with the person you used to love to play hop scotch and hide & seek with until the lights came on, what happened? you search your mind to pin point where it all went wrong, but that's impossible since there is no one thing. people grow and see and understand things differently, and what may be something small to me, may mean the world to you. Without being able to express that, is one thing that leads to a trail of resentment, bitterness, spite and grudges being held.


While what you expierienced, or are experiencing may seem and feel unique, families across the world deal with this everyday. One brother thinks he hates the other, or one cousin can't stand the sight of the next. Now it may be comforting to hear and know that your not just crazy, or that God wasn't just in a bad mood when he dealt your cards but the obvious and more important question here is where do we make things better and go from here?


I suggest to first evaluate yourself. Be real, and be honest with yourself and figure out what you did to add to the mess that your trying to clean up. Once you figure that out, think about why you felt like you did to cause that reaction and what you could do differently since that reaction did nothing to yield a good outcome. The first key to a good resolution is to accept your responsibiity in the situation. When you can accept that, is when you can then have a cordial, one on one conversation where both parties can be heard, because just as you have feelings and things that may have annoyed or hurt you, that other person does too.


Let go, be the bigger person and reach out that olive branch to say lets sit down and figure this out. Life is too short to loose love over mis-understandings and hurt feelings.

Grief...Does It Ever End

We've all have had to deal with it at one time or another. For some its expectant, but for some its Sudden, and with the blink of an eye their world is totally changed. Time cannot be purchased, bribed, earned or stolen. There comes a point in all of our lives when we no longer have time, and a purpose on this earth. When we pass on to leave loved ones behind to grieve our abscence.


So, for those of us left behind, how do we move on? Normally Hope lies inside missing someone. No matter the circumstance, hope even as small as a mustard seed is enough to comfort a longing heart. But to know that the peroson you love is no longer living takes away that small hope, so what do we have to comfort us in that regard? We could fill our days with many things to do, to keep our minds occupied and busy, but when we lay our heads down to rest at night those thoughts and feelings you worked so hard to forget are right there waiting for you. Like a game of cat and mouse, except the mouse is the only one moving, and still manages to get caught. Years pass and still, there is the sting from loosing a loved one, and truth is, it will always hurt. Unless it possible to erase our memories, in which case i personally would rather to take the bitter with the sweet and bask in this love hate relationship. Where I love to remember my loved ones who've passed on but I sometimes hate the way it makes me feel.


Grief is a constant. It has no end. It may dwindle, and become manageble but its still there. So take joy in your memories, and when you feel that sting just think of their smile, and their laugh, and something silly they did to make you laugh. Pray and find comfort in knowing that they're in place we all one day will go. So we all will meet again at another time and another place, But also be thankful for being blessed to have been in their lives on here earth.

Breaking Up With Best Friends....Is It really Worth It?

It feels like you've been together a lifetime together. She was there to gain five pounds with you when your boyfriend broke up with you, and you survived off of walnut ice cream and hershey's chocolate for an entire week. She held your hair for you when you just barely made it to the toilet to throw up all the tequila you drank at the pool party she dragged you to And she even stood by your side every time trouble came your way. She was your best friend. With all all the memories...the good, the bad , the funny and the ugly, you feel like its time to part ways. But how do you that and should you?


Two friends are much like a relationship. There is a level of respect, loyalty and affection that is subconsciously expected in a relationship bewtween two best friends. But as years pass, and people grow, they sometimes grow apart and go in different directions. One person may start to not like hanging out at the old hangout spot and found a new one that the other isn't into, or one is focused on their career or school while the other is still stuck at the party. 


But is it really worth it to loose a good and loyal friend just because you live two different lives? I don't believe its worth it. You can live completely different lives like night and day while still being able to be the person each other lean on for support, and being that person to remind each other who we are, and how we got to where we are. To tell each other, "you've been through worse, remember that time..." when we feel like our world is crashing around us. Letting petty differences divide you is high school, so what if your friend likes to eat vegetables while you like to eat meat,make both! or so what your friend found other cool people that they like to hang out with too, the more the merrier or have your own personal time with your best friend. But in this ugly world today i see it wise to hold onto that loyal friend and never burn your bridges....Without good reason!

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© Tiffany Leslie